Becoming a Tour Caddy

My first ever tournament as a tour caddy!

 

Crans-Sur-Sierre/Crans Montana 

THE VENUE

Wow, what a venue!

This course is halway up the chuffing Alps. A place you only see in books or on the tele, magical.

As this was my first ever tournament as a caddy it was exciting enough, but seeing this place just added to that.

I roomed in a chalet hotel near the course with Muller, and 2 other lads, Jan and Cliff, two Sarth African lads that made up our '4 ball'. We all became great pals and stuck together all the time I caddied.

The town is a ski resort really, but has a cracking golf course as well. Our hotel had a chair lift attached to it, for the skiers to rise the peaks in Winter months, straight from their hotel room door, ready to go on the piste!

One morning, stood on the balcony of our room, the sky above was clear, blue and gorgeous, but about 50 foot below me was fog, 'no golf today in this' i thought. The course was about 200 foot below our digs and as i set off to the course, walking through the fog, it started to clear? It wasn't fog at all, it was just that our digs were above the clouds and the course was below them........... god, what a place!!!


How I got to be a Tour Caddy

99.9% of tour caddies either know a player who invites them on tour to caddy for them, or they know a caddy who sorts them a bag out before they attempt to set off on tour. Well, i did it a bit differently, and ALL the other caddies respected me for that. The reason is, no matter what a caddy may say, they don't like NEW caddies. It is a potential threat for their job. So, a big 'no-no' with all the experienced caddies was 'inviting' your mate to come and caddy!!!

I was a keen golfer, playing as often as i could, got my mates into it, started a Golf Society at Moldgreen Con Club, loved the game. And, as any golfer knows, after 2 bad rounds, it must be the equipment!!

So, with that theory in mind, i was a frequent customer at the American Golf Store in Huddersfield which has gone now. It was on the ring road opposite the cop shop. Mind you, it was replaced with a Wine Superstore, so not all bad.

As i was a regular, i knew all the staff. I am sociable sorta fella, so i wouldn't just go in and buy stuff, i would have a natter. In those 'natters' i must have mentioned caddies, probably when i found out what Steve Williams earned per year as Tiger Woods' caddy. One day, in the shop, most likely buying new balls as i lose my fair share, the chap on the counter pointed to a chap who was leaving and said "He used to caddy on tour for Canizares."


It was instant, i just wanted to chat to this fella, something made me run out and introduce myself.


He was well in his 60s, maybe older, small fella, just a normal sorta 'old bloke' to anyone else, but to me, he caddied for a prolific winner on the European Tour, this man was a legend!


I had thought about being a caddy quite a bit. My job, although I was doing really well at it, with The Yorkshire Post, was starting to bore me. I had recently split with my missus, who had taken my daughter Laura, and the bloody dog, so I was bored at home as well.


After introducing myself i asked this fella what it was like being a 'tour caddy' and he told me a few tales which sounded superb. We chatted for about 20 mins and when I asked him how could 'i' become a tour caddy, he said a line i will take to my grave...
"If you don't know any caddies or players, no one is going to ring you are they? You need to get on plane and show your face at a tournament!"


That was it. It was a eureka moment. I AM GOING TO BE A TOUR CADDY!


He was right, i don't know anyone, or anything about being a caddy, about getting a player that will want me to caddy for him. But, it was something to aim for. I got home, slept on it, which was daft in itself. The next day, which was a Sunday, i spent on the internet, looking at anything i could find on how to be a caddy. There was nothing! Only thing i knew was that i had to 'get out there' and go to tournaments. This took time and money, a risky strategy, so i was a bit stuck as it needed a bit o cash to fund.


Then, about 2 weeks later, The Yorkshire Post was bought out and the new owners had no plans in the New Media market. I ran the New Media dept at the time. I was offered some other great posts within the company, more money even, to stay, or voluntary redundancy.


Interesting. Redundancy. Cash. Plane Fares. Digs. Tour Caddy.... hmmmm!!


I got about £7k and booked a 5 week trip, flights only as i had no idea where to stay, following the tour. Munich, Cran Montana/Sur Sierre, Cologne, Paris and Fife, for the Dunhill Links pro am.


I had some notice to work so i booked in advance, ready to be a caddy. Just before i set off, i took my daughter Laura to Greece on holiday. All the time i was there, when we chatted to folk at the hotel etc, i told everyone i was a tour caddy, i think even I believed it after a while.


Then I set off to Munich, all packed and ready for travelling, but so unready as becoming a caddy, it was just a goal, not a reality, but, as they say, the rest is history!



GOLF

The short tale is... my man, Senor Costantion Rocca played shyte and missed the cut! But, more to it than that and I didn't give a toss if he won or came plumb last, I was a tour caddy!


We had Monday off, as i found out was the norm, and, as agreed i met Tino (Senor Rocca) at the clubhouse at 12pm Tuesday. I was on the clubhouse terrace, having a coke after my lunch as he walked by and i greeted him with the words...

"Buon giorno Senor Rocca, lei ha dormito bene?  (good morning Mr Rocca, did you sleep well?)

Bit wank i know, but he smiled and Muller, Cliff and Jan, who were sat with me, looked at me as if i was some sort of escaped nutter!

It worked. It set the scene with me and Tino. Muller had taught me, caddying is doing a a good job ya, but, more importantly, its about getting on with your man, your player, the golfer.

Hi ho, hi ho, its off to work we go!


I was all set up and had my tips from Muller about what to do to get your man ready. His bag, the stuff he needs from the manufacturers trucks like balls, gloves etc, i was set, ready to rock n roll, which Tino saw and appreciated.


After a wee warm up on the range, on the course we went, for a practice round.


The 'practice round' is crucial. its the time, yardage book in hand, you can suss out the course. The 'run outs', the 'safe points' on the greens, how bad the rough is, what clubs to hit on each hole etc, essential. Essential that is unless you are passed your best! 

Tino wasn't really up for practice rounds, he'd played all of the courses so many times anyway, what was he gonna learn? But i hadn't, and i was well keen, making notes on my yardage book. On the 'detailed' yardage books (i still have most of them, including my first at Crans) and I would record what club we hit off the tee, what yardage that left us to the front of the green, and pin yardage, what club we hit to the green, where it pitched and how far it ran on, all with a note of the wind speed and direction. This was serious stuff, i had a job to do.


The next day, the Wednesday was pro-am day. A mini tournament that involved 3 amateurs going out with a given pro as a team. All the amateurs were really excited to be going out with the legend Costantino Rocca but he didn't give a shyte, it bored him, but, he got paid for it so that softened the blow for him. 

Again, I made more notes as we went round and i was starting to learn a lot very quickly. Tino helped me a lot as well, as 'arsey' as he was, he did give me quite a few pointers on how to act on the course mainly; how to tend a flag properly, where i should stand, how to rake a bunker well etc.

Thursday..... tournament day.

We were paired with Julien Clement and Barry Lane. After a warm up on the range, then a few chips, bunker shots and a few putts we were on our way to the first tee.

Rocca was all cool and chilled and chatty as we sat near the first tee and watched Seve, who was in the group in front of us carve one left into the trees, 'nothing unusual there' i thought, just nice to see it in the flesh. Then it was us, we were next off. We made our way to the starter and provided on the tee was fruit, sarnies, golf tees, pencils, stats cards and most importantly, the bibs!

I reached out for mine, with big letters ROCCA on it and as i put it on, i can't even describe how good it felt, 'this is it, i'm a tour caddy' i thought!!

I picked up the bag and walked to the side of the first tee where there were quite a lot of spectators but i wasn't nervous at all. I was excited, but not nervous. I knew this was meant to be, it was my calling, my dream and i had made it. I was proud of myself!

The first was a par 5 and Tino hit a good drive, well, really good in fact, but half way up the Alps, the ball does go about 10% further than it would normally. Looking at my yardage book, (which i still have to this day), i can see we had 216 yards to the front of the green, the pin was 16 yards on, so 232 total, downhill, no wind, but we were in Crans so it would travel. He hit a 4 iron onto the green but about 60 foot from the flag. Still, par 5, on in two, good start.

When we were on the green, a caddies job is to clean the ball after the player has marked it. Just a towel, getting any muck and turf of it and checking it wasn't cracked. So, Tino marks his ball and passes it to me to clean. It was his honour to putt and he went over to the hole to look 'back' down the line of his putt. I was stood near his marker on the green and as he looked, crouched down, he mumbled something to me. I was 60 feet away and couldn't hear him so i asked him what he said. Again he mumbled, so i asked again "What are you saying to me?" and he stood up from his crouch position, pointing to his marker near me and said, slowly and loudly, taking the piss basically "Put, the ball, behind, the, marker!" as if i was deaf or foreign, which drew a snigger from the crowd around the green.

'You cheeky git' I thought 'who the hell do you think you are bloody talking to' was rushing around my head. So, without hesitation, i rolled the ball to him across the green, at pace, which he had to stop with his foot and said "Do it your fucking self!"

'No one can talk to me like that and if this is caddying, you can stick it up your arse' were my thoughts as i picked up the bag and just walked straight to the second tee. My plan was to finish the 2nd hole, which is back up near the clubhouse and drop the bag and leave. I wasn't gonna stand for that sorta shyte. I was gutted though, i so wanted to be a caddy but if that's how golfers treated caddies it wasn't for me, i would end up lamping someone, i know i would.

Rocca and the other players and caddies came onto the second tee and after his birdie it was his honour again. He stood next to me and said "Martino (his name for me, basically, every word he knew in English he seemed to just add an 'o' on the end), what you think here, you think Driver or maybe is a 3 wood huh?"

The second hole is 436 yards long and a fairway bunker on the right was 240 yards away, 280 to carry. So, this was in 3 wood range, Driver was the obvious play but i was still so pissed off at him and said "Ya, hit 3 wood and put it in the bunker if you want!"

There was an atmosphere to put it mildly. He looked at me and said "Ok, we hit driver" as he pulled it out the bag and removed the head cover. He hit another nice drive, well passed the bunker and in the middle of the fairway. He then, which I was to find out was very unusual for him, put the head cover back on and put the driver bag in bag himself and smiled at me and said "I think this drive is ok yes?"

I just shrugged my shoulders, i didn't give a shit to be honest, i was dropping his bag at the green and leaving. Then, as we walked up the fairway, he started small talk about my digs, my mates, my family etc as he patted me on the back. This was his way of apologising and to be fair, it worked. He was a nice fella and i think he was just excited on the first green, so, i forgave him and said nothing else on the matter. Little did i know, that that incident on the first green just made Tino respect me as a person. He knew i was not a kid who he could bully.

I heard later that in the past two seasons, no caddie had stayed with Tino for more than 2 weeks as he could be so arsey. For me it was the start of 14 months working with him!

He shot a 1 under par 70 that day, but 4 over the next day to miss the cut, but i didn't care, this was the first of many, i knew that, and i felt great about that!

THE CRAIC

One thing most caddies are good at, is partying and having the craic!

It didn't matter where we were in the world, the place was 'having it' from the caddies. It's a tough life, bloody hard work. Days could start at 4am or finish at 9pm, almost all of that time stood on your feet, or walking, lumping a bloody heavy bag about. Pressure was involved too. Imagine stood there looking at green surrounded by water, say in the French Open at the 18th. Your man has asked you for the yardage which you need to get spot on. The wind direction and speed. Take into account how well he is playing or not, as the case may be. What results we had in the other rounds compared to where we are now. Then, say to your man "It's an 8 iron" with confidence. As the ball leaves his club and starts rising, you feel a big gust of wind, well trust me, you shit yourself. Its totally your fault now if he slams it in the water!

So, caddies like to have the craic to wind down and in Crans, like at every other venue, there were a couple of bars that were the caddies favourites.

Muller had said to me to be careful how much I drank in Crans, which seemed strange. But, he advised that we are at such a high altitude that you get pissed on half the amount of ale you would normally. 'What a load o bollocks' i thought but as usual, Muller was right. Why don't i ever listen?


I had stayed in Monday as we got there quite late and on Tuesday as well as it was the pro-am the next day and i didn't want to be hungover and stinking of beer. Same with Wednesday, as we were off early on the Thursday and it was my first day 'at work' so to speak. But, Thursday, after my first professional round as a caddie i was having a few jars. Late tee off the next day so I could have a lie in as well.


After Tino's 'warm down' on the range following the first round, bags were put away and i was heading off to town. The course was in the middle of the town anyway, so all shops, bars and restaurants were all very close by. So i went to this little bar where all the caddies hung out at about 3pm, a nice afternoon bevvie in the sun. I was so giddy anyway after my first proper day as a caddie so i didn't really need any ale to get me going but it felt rude not to!!

Well, as was always the case in Crans, you don't remember much of the night before, but one memory does stick in my mind and that was i was supposed to meet up with Muller, his golfer Emanuel Canonica, and my man Rocca, for a meal at a nice Italian restaurant down the road and Muller was going to fetch me from the bar.


Muller told me he turned up at about 6pm and took one look at me, swaying all over the place, seriously leathered, and left me to it. He told our men he couldn't find me!


I was informed by others that i batted on, after some dinner, and even ended up going clubbing to the early hours. For all i know, they could have all being lying as i don't remember a bloody thing!